Not Anymore

Not Anymore

There is a limit to what I can endure,
I have cried and shouted till my throat got sore.
But no, no, not anymore.
I snatch the keys to the door
That had been locked for so long.
No, no, I won't stay anymore.
I'll escape from here by my own force.
I'll do everything on my own for sure.
I was trapped, but no, no, not anymore.

I light a match and burn everything down,
Every picture I used to treasure.
Leave my life, now!
I throw every reminder out of the window,
Scratch every record I sang.
I am better off alone.
I cry to myself sitting on the ground,
You are just a sad memory.
I loved you, but not anymore.

Everything about you now I despise.
I listen to every word you ever said and say;
Lies, lies, lies!
I wasn't able to see through that disguise.
Everything was perfect, just yesterday.
Look at how time flies!
It isn't long till the time the last tear dries,
Soon, I'll be on my way.
Witness how love dies!

Everything engraved on the black page.
All of it shall end.
Everything is now nothing but a burnt image,
The disappearing ink of a pen.
Every feeling that I had shall now fade,
I shall mend myself.
Every feeling that was carved by that blade,
No longer shall it frighten.

The sun has set for a reason.
It's time to seek the next lesson.
A new journey is about to begin.
Time has come for me to leave,
It's sad that I know that you won't miss me.
I told you I'll go, see?
Now I am sailing off the gloomy shore,
All alone, because I need you no more.
No, not anymore.

- Tensai-Teki Kuroneko

Again

The poem would tell you what I am going through...

Again

Despite what everyone seemed to tell,
My heart is not the one I can teach.
Love seems to be a magic spell;
Under which you are what I seek.
Now, I find myself falling for your smile,
I am captivated by the same charm, twice;
Will I go through the same emotions this time?
I wonder as I again roll the dice.

I am trapped in an open cage,
Still I can't break out of the daze.
I notice that there are several ways to escape,
But even a simple step seems to be a maze.
You have come across with your innocence,
Even though I really don't want all that pain.
Because I am completely losing my sense.
And now I am falling for you, again.

My love has forever been a twinkling flame,
Amidst the darkness, it flickers as it burns,
And when I felt it would blow away,
You held it closely, so again it glowed.
But I don't feel the same excitement now,
And I don't dream of you till dawn.
Maybe because I have learnt my lesson,
But I still love you beyond reason.

Even if different, I assure you that it's genuine,
Please understand that I am just keeping my distance.
It is because I don't want to bring you trouble,
I don't want to destroy your peaceful bubble.
I just want to be wanted and needed,
I just want to tell you about everything I have felt.
But, you have never returned the warmth I showered,
You have never allowed romance between us to flower.

I won't approach you this time and I won't try to show any sign.
You unknowingly shoved me into a pit of thorns,
But I won't mind because you never wanted to scorn.
Please don't test my passion, just for your satisfaction.
Please, I won't be able to tolerate that look of disdain.
Now that I am falling for you again.

- Tensai-Teki Kuroneko

It's Raining

After anger... sadness.

It's Raining

I am sitting all alone on my roof,
Staring at the distant lights that shine really bright.
I am getting wet but I am in no mood to move.
I feel like breaking down but only let out a sigh.
Once more, you are gone when I need you.
You caused these things that I am going through.
Today, I don't expect you to come when it's hurting,
I am sure today, it's raining.

I get so cold when I feel the raindrops,
I huddle up closely to get some warmth.
It's so dark here, I feel so lonely,
I see others cheering, and smile sadly.
I want to cuddle up in the blankets in my room,
But I don't think I'll go down anytime soon.
Today, I feel this is more comforting,
For me, today, it's surely raining.

Isn't it sad, I used to love rains before you came,
You went, and it seems like nothing has changed.
Then, I was lonely, today ever so cold.
You have hurt me, and you don't even know.
I want to push all this aside, and go on with my life.
From this agony, I only want to hide.
But I can't, it feels so wrong;
To forget someone who isn't long gone.

Today, I am afraid to face myself,
I may not be able to go on without help.
Who would come now?
I want to forget you, but how?
Why does everyone speak of you?
Would I get someone to listen to?
You have left me in despair,
You came and disappeared to nowhere.
I shouldn't have lost my mind,
Then I wouldn't have been left behind.

I still stare at the doorway and look out of the window.
You aren't coming, yes, I know.
The rain is falling harder, it's getting darker.
You have let me down, I stare at the dirt.
It's hurting.
Not only in the town, but also in my heart.
It's raining.

- Tensai-Teki Kuroneko

I Am Done, Sweetheart

Inspired by a really nice song, Picture to Burn by Taylor Swift. I'll get out of this dark mood soon, guys, just let me take my frustration off with a few more poems~!

I Am Done, Sweetheart

Never thought that you would make me say this,
But you sought after every opportunity you got.
I am tired of giving you so many chances,
When all you do is waste them all.
I know you never gave a damn about me,
You didn't even have the courage to say a sorry.

I can't even count how many times I have cried,
Not even once did I have you by my side.
I am surprised, even though you never did fake any concern;
It still took me a while to figure it out, hon.
I took it till today, and I can't take it anymore.
Really, I never thought that you would be someone I would abhor.
I am sorry, dear, but now I won't let you twist my heart.
I am done with you, Sweetheart.

Even when you shattered all my wishes,
Just saying so that you don't badly guess;
Sadly for you, I didn't cry lakes of tears.
Didn't I already tell you, you weren't worth them, dear?
People say that 'love is blind' and I find it true,
But someone so unkind? Never thought it would be you.

I gave you my heart and you threw it down the drain,
You didn't even turn around to see my pain.
Now that I am able to think, I have figured who you are.
You aren't as innocent as you seem by far.
You weren't brave enough to face me after your deeds;
It explains your actions quite well, indeed.
You can turn hurting someone into an art;
But now, I am done with you, Sweetheart.

Now when I finally understand your conceited air,
I now know I couldn't have lived with your stupid attitude.
That vanity would have been such a pain to endure.
I wonder if you were ever taught that ignoring someone is quite rude!
Now, you have your image all burned to ashes,
Now that I have uncovered all your faces.

Your story, I always knew;
And I am sorry for what she did to you,
But what happened with you doesn't give you the right,
To treat me as bad as you like.
That bitter outlook is going to drag you down,
I could have tried to correct it if I were still around.
But you never gave me an 'authority to hurt',
And now I am done, Sweetheart.

Excellence at anything is in my character,
What you saw was only the teaser.
The whole movie is still left, my dear,
 And that is something you should really fear.
No one has ever been able to win against it;
It's really bad that you don't see where you have hit.
I am telling you, I never lose a fight,
You better keep that in mind.

Look at the irony, you were my first heartbreak;
Someone for whom I once could have put my life on stake.
You'll realize your loss after my feelings fade,
But I have made up my mind and I declare it today;
Even though it's quite sad to depart,
I am done with you,Sweetheart.

- Tensai-Teki Kuroneko